Single, Sarcastic, and Standing Tall

Here’s the thing, love – or rather, the lack of love – has been the best gift. Sure, it sounds lonely. And yes, I could possibly have some psychological effects like fear of commitment, lack of trust and overall too lazy to try. But hey, I’ve gained so much more. Even though you might be laughing right now, I honestly mean it. 

Because I was born with a chronic case of singleness, I have had plenty of time to learn things about myself. For starters, I learned I cope to frustrating circumstances with sarcasm. For any psychologists out there, that might sound like a bad idea. However, this ‘coping mechanism’ brought me to writing, which led me to my blog and snowballed into getting me a good job and an important skill-set. Because I released my anger in the form of sassy blog posts, I practiced my writing, fell in love with writing and accomplished more than I ever expected – including writing an {unpublished} book. 

Secondly, I learned to build a solid ground under my feet. I don’t need to rely on someone else to figure things out, to pay my bills, to hold my hand if I’m scared or to share a meal with (let’s be honest, who ever wants to share food?). I can figure things out with my great mind, I can pay my bills with the job I have earned, I can cry and pick myself back up and I can eat an entire pizza on my own. I know too many friends who would be in complete shambles if they were ever single again, and I know friends who have survived terrible relationships and came out stronger. I want to be strong no matter what emotions I weather in the future. So I’ve built my solid ground and I’m standing tall. 

Finally, I’ve learned how awesome I am. Who else have I had 25+ years to get to know? With the time I’ve spared from chasing guys and being sad over being single, I have focused on me. I’m a very selfish person, actually. I put my education, my career, my health, my hobbies and, of course, food first in my life. All my extra time goes to seeing my sweet niece, having dinner with my parents, laughing with old friends and meeting new friends. I’m totally selfish and have done what I want with whoever I want. 

Besides all of the positive, empowering results of being single, there’s also the basic, shallow reasons like not having to remember someone else’s birthday, not having to share my food and always having full control of the TV. 

So if you’re single, and feel like you’ve been plagued by it, don’t fear. Chin up, sassy pants on and let’s do this thing called life, one set of footprints at a time! 

Shayla O'Keeffe is a writer, photographer, foodie and is currently adulting like a pro...crastinator. For eight hours a day, she works in communications for a tech manufacturer. At night, she writes and works toward her dream of getting her book published.